you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
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