honey bunches of taint.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I don't deserve a penis
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
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