Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
