I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
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