I am midnight drunk by noon
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
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