it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
