It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
