Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
