is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
