well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
