At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
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