i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
