You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
