Duck Duck Cougar?
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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