Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
