OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
True but thats because hes a fetus.
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
