oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
