What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Randomize
