My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize
