There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Randomize
