Im at strip club and am horny
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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