end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
