New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
