Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
