I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
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