she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
where does the pee come out of this thing
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Randomize
