Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Randomize