Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
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