Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
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