erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize