You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
