Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Randomize
