There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
