That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
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He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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