idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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