butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
