he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Randomize