we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
