Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
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