why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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