At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize