aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
