HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
