David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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