K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
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