OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
