At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
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