maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
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