once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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