Taylor Swift is so right about you.
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Randomize
