That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
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