So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
we're so committed to being not committed
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Randomize
